Songs in Mason & Dixon

Pynchon loves to embed song lyrics into the text of his stories. For him the writing process does not involve only the traditional dialogue and description, but song lyrics to flavor the story too. Below are listed the songs that Pynchon writes for Mason & Dixon, organized by the order in which they appear.

Songs in Mason & Dixon

P. 18

Ask me anything you please,
The Learnèd English Dog am I, well-
Up on ev'rything from Fleas
Unto the King's Mon-og-am-eye,

Persian Princes, Polish Blintzes,
Chinamen's Geo-mancy,--
Jump-ing Beans or Flying Machines,
Just as it suits your Fan-cy.

I quote enough of the Classickal Stuff
To set your Ears a-throb,
Work logarith-mick Versèd Sines
Withal, within me Nob,
-- Only nothing Ministerial, please,
Or I'm apt to lose m' Job,
As, the Learnèd English Dog, to-ni-ight!

P. 27

Gamesters in Trouble, Sweet-Hearts untrue,
Sailors with no one to bid them adieu,
Roistering Fops and the Mast-Pond Brigade, all
Impatient to chat with the Sibylline Maid, singing,

Let us go down, to Hepsie's tonight,
Maybe tonight, she'll show us the Light,--
Maybe she'll cackle, and maybe she'll cry,
But for two and a kick she won't spit in your Eye.

She warn'd Ramillies sailors, Beware of the Bolt,
And the Corsica-bound of Pa-oli's Revolt,--
From lottery Tickets to History's End,
She's the miserable, bug-bitten sailor's best friend, singing,
Let us go down, &c.

P. 34

"Where girls all look like Cleo-
Pat-tra,
And when you're done you'll simply
Barter 'er,
For yet another twice as
Hot, tra-
La la-la la-la la-la la--
La la la, la..."

P. 40

"Ooh,
   La,
     Fran...
       -Ce-euh! [with a certain debonair little Mordant upon "euh"],
Ne
Fait-pas-la-Guerre,
Con-truh les Sci-
            -en-
                ceuhs!"

P. 48

Where are the wicked young Widows tonight,
That sail the East India Trade?
Topside with the Captain, below with the Crew,
Beauteously ever display'd.
Oh I wish I was anyplace,
But the Someplace I'm in,
With too many Confusions and Pains,--
Take me back to the Cross-Roads,
Let me choose, once again,
To cruise the East India Lanes.

P. 50

We swore up and down, that we'd sail nevermore,
Thro' waters infested by French-men,
Whilst in Safety and Smugness, all dry on the Shore,
Kept Morton and all of his Hench-men,--
Yet a Shark is a Shark, in the day or the dark,
Be he Minister, fish or King's Be-ench-man,
With a Munch and a Crunch and the Lunch shall be free!
And Good-bye, Royal Soci...e-tee!
[Refrain]
For we're off to the Indies, off to the East,
Ho for the Fables and Ho for the Feast,--
Grov'ling like Slaves in the Land of the Turk,
There's nought an Astronomer won't do for the Work.